To the Father’s house, to re-live the Mass in person. The emotion these events arouse is what this testimony which comes to us from Spain transmits, the first installment of this series of articles that tell about the fact of returning to mass in times of pandemic.
Dear Philotea (the one who loves God):
I haven’t written to you in a long time. You already know that this “confinement” is altering the natural rhythm of all of us and sometimes I don’t even know what day it is. Days go by so fast and they are so strange… But I didn’t want to wait any longer to tell you about a very great gift the Lord, in his infinite Mercy, has granted us again.
Yes
Yes, yes, I can imagine that your heart, so God loving, has jumped with joy when imagining the news… Indeed, once again we have been able to enjoy the heart of the Church! Once again we have been able to attend the Eucharist in person! Wow… what a huge gift, right? Because it is an impressive, infinite gift, that does not fit in our little minds, that the Lord wanted to stay among us in something as affordable as a piece of bread and a little wine, and only because of the words of some poor little men chosen by him for a very high vocation: to be another Christ in our midst. Yes … with you I exclaim again: what an immense gift!
Our bishop was one of the first to close churches as the pandemic began. His great prudence made him do so, since in the Diocese we have had some of the most important cases. However, “digital churches” were opened almost instantly everywhere, filling the networks with initiatives where we could continue celebrating together with our pastors.
Special days
Those were some very special days where I felt very close to Him, who became closer than ever, and to so many of our brothers who, due to the area where they live or the circumstances they live in, cannot access the sacraments as easily as we do. You know, sometimes I felt that the Church in my heart was more universal than ever …
But the soul yearns for more and more … and only He who is Infinite can quench his thirst for infinity … So when they told us that churches were being opened so that, firstly, we could have the possibility to pray, confess and receive Holy Communion… I jumped for joy as I know you would jump when you read my words. That great event took place on May 11 … Yes, yes, I know that it took me a while to write to tell you about it … but let me continue as there is more.P
I was able to go that same day. But, if to tell you the truth, I could only pray. It is true that I thought I was ready to receive Holy Communion, because I prepared myself conscientiously when the Pope gave us the possibility of gaining plenary indulgence. The previous days were really penitential days for me and I received the gift of indulgence with such joy … I think there are no human words to express it …
The great Mystery
But, I don’t know why, on the 11th I felt totally unworthy and very weak. I believe that these days of confinement have made me appreciate even more the great Mystery that the sacraments represent. And I am sure, dear Filotea, that the same thing happens to you, because your soul also vibrates with God’s things.
That day and the next I could only stand before Him in silence. In absolute silence … And I think that made me even more hungry for His Presence in my innermost being. So on the 13th, the day of the Virgin of Fatima !, and by the hand of the Mother (how could I not do it on Her day and with Her?), I threw myself to confession and receive Holy Communion later. You know, friend there was silence again ……but this time filled with Him in the midst of my poverty and weakness. Only Him … was there anything else I needed? Perhaps only the fragile and amazed by so much Mercy “thank you” that emerged later …
Open
We stayed that way for a few days. And two weeks later … the public service was opened! A Monday, a simple Monday, where the Lord poured out again through the priest’s words, like every day of confinement, but this time we were there to listen to them through the glasses fogged by the masks. I would have jumped and screamed if it weren’t because you had to maintain a certain composure… but the emotion was so great… The priest did send us his, sharing the joy he felt when he saw us in front and not empty benches. And I understood him so well! Even tears…
And not just public worship … also my parish chapel of perpetual adoration has reopened. This time more time in the large temple than in the chapel itself, because of safety space. Again Jesus is in His house with the doors open, waiting with His open doors Heart, for us to be with Him for a little while … Jesus came to our houses during the hardest weeks of confinement and returning his visit is a gift … More for me than for Him, of course. But… I know you understand me… I’m sure that seeing all of us there is also a gift for Him…
I am sending you this letter, with the hope that it reaches you soon. The good news of Jesus is always eager to share quickly.
Soon, very soon, we will meet again and we will go together to the feet of Jesus, as so often.
Take care. A hug in Christ.
Love, your friend Elena
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