“Allowing ourselves to be found“
In all of our lives there is a search for God, where we begin to build a path and we understand that there is a learning process on this path of the search itself.
We will see three types of searches that we could experience within our priesthood:
1. Searching in the style of Mary Magdalene: This is the search that we have in our priesthood, where the desire to have exclusivity appears. We go through the crisis of believing that Jesus is not there… but it’s not that He is not there, it is that we do not see Him. We find ourselves in a situation where the search is reduced to the fact that our passion and hopes about the priesthood have diminished. It is here where a key element appears: allowing ourselves to be found. Allowing ourselves to be found makes us fight day by day to maintain our priesthood; the priesthood of Christ. This very search makes us feel like we can’t see Him or find Him, because we are often overwhelmed with worries and disappointments: not enough funds, the problem of debts, and people with their complaints, etc.
2. Searching in the style of Peter: This happens when I have denied Him and distanced myself from God Himself. It is important to understand that we have all received God’s mercy. Therefore, a search begins here, but not from an exclusivity like Mary Magdalene, but from the knowledge that I need to receive forgiveness. How many priests today are afraid of seeking Jesus, because they made a mistake? Jesus shows us that the mistake is just a mistake and that’s it. The search in Peter’s style, for the priest, is to assume that because mistakes were made in the priestly life, that we may even deny that grace that God Himself gives us.
This search appears united with the need for forgiveness. When forgiveness is sought by the priest, then that search by the priest ends in forgiveness. Here we see the need to assume that, as a priest, I am weak and I seek God from my weakness.
3. Searching John’s style: This style is a passionate and accelerated search, like that priest who fills himself with things, but then completely empties himself. It is the situation when the agenda explodes, but you find yourself in existential solitude. It is important here to stop and look at where your life and your story are going, but above all, it is to discover the reason why you’ve chosen to do this. The path that you are taking in your story is to understand your own actions; to be able to assume the whole of your reality, moving from this path towards a concrete objective.
These three types of searches that the priest makes lead to a journey comprised of different moments in life. This makes your life have a before and an after. It is the stage that one seeks and hopes to achieve.
Today, as a priest, I ask Jesus to help you search for Him, and accept your reality, and to assume your pastoral ministry from this reality.
Something good is on the way!
